HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR RACH.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU.

HIP HOORAY.

HIP HIP HOORAY.

HIP HIP HIP HOORAY.

Rach, hope you have a great day working, heh heh heh..Luv ya xoxo

I don't know why I opened this up....

I'm feeling emotionally spent at the moment. I want to laugh but I want to cry. I spent all day at work trying to hold back tears. The hilarious thing is..I don't know why I wanna cry...Well, that's only half true.

At the moment, I have no idea who to trust and who I can talk to.

I know I can trust/talk to Mum but that's all. Maz is kinda shitty at me at the moment and it sucks...I went off at Amanda for talking about me behind my back which she did- she in turn accused Maz of telling me which was totally unfair. It's no good around here anymore.

I got home from the Auslan Only Weekend last night. It was awesome- it was a total time-out for me...I wasn't in the 'real-world' for a couple of days and it was so good. I actually had a good talk with two people- I was really honest with them about how I was feeling and more about who I am. It felt good to admit some things that I'd never admit to anyone else.

When I got home- it all came tumbling back. I KNOW I've got friends but at the moment, I'm trying to convince myself that I don't have any so I don't get hurt anymore. And it's working kinda..I feel that I'm all alone (with the exception of a few people)- that I don't have any friends that I can trust. It hurts also to push away people I love dearly. Oh well, I'll get over it eventually.

Everything else in life is good. I still have my job...I'm going away again this weekend and my team for Darts are in the semis tomorrow night, I'm working Wednesday night and might be doing dinner with someone on Thursday and Fri-Sun..away for the weekend. It's just me that's just feeling wrecked but...no-one else knows except for someone I told on the weekend..

Rach's birthday is on Wednesday and I'm stressing out cause I'm working on her present but can't finish til I get some stuff from someone else that I'm working on it with. Argh! If you're reading this- HURRY UP! I'M WAITING FOR THE STUFF!!!...Probably won't be able to give it to her by Wednesday but she knows that it could be a little delayed...

Aaaargh...I just feel like screaming, going for a drive or getting totally plastered but at the same time, I want control over my mind and body so..I'm going to take it easy + post here when I need to talk. No-one reads my blog anymore so...doesn't bother me what I write anymore.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR AMES.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU.

HIP HOORAY!

HIP HIP HOORAY!

HIP HIP HIP HOORAY!!!!!

The best of the bestest of birthday wishes to my dear friend AMY!

MWAH! :)

Argh- not happy.

Why do people take joy in spreading rumours?

Why do they take joy in talking about other people?

I'll admit, I HAVE talked about others before but I've grown up.

Do people have no respect for other people these days? Why do people take amusement in talking about others in the evillest way possible? Backstabbing fucking dumb people.

I'm cranky to say the least. Um, last weekend..at Tien's party..something happened between me and a couple of people and now I find that it's all over and people are 'whispering' about it and talking about it. The story's getting stranger by the minute. I have to stop people and say 'no, that's not right' and then end up telling them the whole story so they've got it "straight". People I thought I could trust are apparently the 'ringleaders' of the whole gossip circle.

Rumour mill working overtime, that's what it is.

Rumours SUCK! Practically everyone knows now.

If you're one of those people that TALKED about what happened and you're reading this, FUCK YOU! Seriously, if you're a friend that I told in confidence...Well.. FUCK YOU EVEN MORE!

I'm finished...for now.

Hey guys!

It's been a whil;e hey? But don't worry- I won't go in a long winded description of what I've been doing. I'll spare you!!

I last updated after getting back from Melbourne which was over a month ago. Oh my god, didn't realise it was that bad!

I haven't done a lot of 'different' stuff. I've just been working/partying. Oh, I was on camp last week and oh my god....it was like a camp for problem children!! Maz, Craig and I really learnt from the experience. I just hope the kids enjoyed themselves...

I don't really have heaps to say because I'm feeling out of it.
Last night was Tien's 22nd birthday party. Quite surprisingly..there was no violence at all...or fighting.

Most parties they've had- there's always been one incident but last night was good..just relaxing and having a drink..or..two..or even ten! :P

Oh well...I don't have work tomorrow because I'm feeling a little off. If there's anything you'd like me to specify on...Camp... parties..or anything else you'd like to see me write about...post a comment and I'll elaborate. I don't know who reads my blog these days because I've been so slack about it.. I'd like to know who reads it..so..leave a comment and let me know you're alive!

Love you guys and I'll try my best to update more but its hard when you've got a busy life..I'm sure you understand...

xoxoxoxoxoxoxox

K

I just wanted to drop by and say hey before I went off to camp!! :)

Friendship's a funny thing. I was going through my photos today and thought I'd compare two photos of Kara (kazy.tblog.com) and me...from 13 years ago...and from two weekends ago.

We lost touch when we were a little bit younger but... Kara found my address while on holidays and thought she'd send me a postcard...and we were reunited... Life works in funny ways.

Kara and I have had our funny moments, our sad moments and..everything else. I'm not pinpointing Kara for any reason..just that she's one of the longest-standing deaf friends I've had..apart from some others..like Diane..

Luv ya Kaz :)

Posting the pic here...

 [image]speshy_560002268.jpg[/image]

Kara + Kat and in the recent pic.. Kat + Kara..in case I confused ya :)

Friendship's such a fickle thing, isn't it? :)